The quote above is courtesy of Raymond, doing his Bill Cosby imitation. No matter how many times he does it, I laugh and laugh.
Anyway! I do have a point. And that point is pudding, the least pointy of all foods. That staple of salad bars and Chinese buffets. I mentioned it in my last post, how I like my yogurt to be as thick as pudding. There is something infinitely satisfying in a nice big spoon of inexplicably jiggy-yet-stiff puddin. The last time Raymond and I went to Beef and Boards, we got a huge plate of nothing but pudding. It's like ice cream, but it doesn't hurt my sensitive front teeth (of the five or six episodes of Friends that I've actually watched in my life, only one exchange actually made me laugh- some guy was telling some other guy he was weird for not liking ice cream, and the guy replied, "It's too cold!" I feel you, man.)
I used to really love making the Jello Pudding from a box because I could mess with the chemistry to get it as thick as humanly possible. I pretty much want a cheesecake-like consistency. I would use half the amount of milk and a nice healthy dose of heavy cream. I tell you what, that thing about beating for two minutes? I rarely made it past one. It was that thick. And delicious.
But since then I have developed a grocery shopping and cooking habit, and since I can't control myself from cooking in bulk (I must have inherited my inability to make any dish that serves less than 8 people from my mom, who was one of 7 kids), I have very limited fridge space. So, no more making huge bowls of pudding unless I wanted to buy another Maytag. Also, the purpose of buying sugar free yogurt is kind of defeated when you use heavy cream.
But wait, what? You mean they make puddings in individual sizes? That are DIET? Oh, surely you jest.
Jell-O Sugar Free Dulce de Leche Pudding Cups
Just in time for Cinco de Mayo, it's that favorito Mexicano, dulce de leche! In case you hadn't noticed it, despite my mentioning it every two fucking seconds, I lived in South America for a few months (Uruguay and Brazil.) Though I was subjected to a smorgabord of disgusting edibles (mayonnaise covered pizza, for one, and pizza never deserves to be violated in such a way), I did eat a hell of a lot of dulce de leche. If I remember correctly, it's made with a lot of brown sugar and condensed milk. There's a lot of dulce de leche in the States now, so I don't need to explain it to you, but it's pretty much carmel. As a side note, I had more delicious pudding-like desserts in Brazil than I can possibly relate to you. One of my favorites was torta da bola, which amused my friends to no end because it means 'ball cake' and it sounds funny with an American accent. It was a shit ton of egg whites, sugar, and condensed milk with pieces of chocolate 'balls'. Holy eff, was it ever yummy.
Anywho, these pudding cups are not just little bowls of dulce de leche (though that would be delicious and exactly the kind of thing I would eat, as I often prefer condiments to their vehicles.) That is the topping, and the rest of it is some sort of flan-like custard. You don't get a whole lot of topping, and it's a little thinner than I would have liked- the dulce de leche I am used to it so thick that the spoon gets stuck by the end of the stirring. However, I suppose that would make it kind of difficult for the little robots to put dulce de leche into the cups without their mechanical arms getting gummed up, so I'll forgive them. Because these things are really good. I don't know that I would call them delicious, but they are pretty damn tasty. The custard part is satisfyingly thick and if you use a small enough spoon, they actually take awhile to eat (in my quest to stop eating two desserts I have taken to eating my pudding with a baby spoon that belongs to my two year old niece. If that isn't pathetic, I don't know what is. But it's working.) They aren't some paltry, pansy-ass tiny pudding cups. That is a rip off and I wouldn't reccommend them if they did that to you.
The most awesome thing about these pudding cups? 60 calories. No lie. That means you can ditch those pathetic little Oreo 100 calorie packs that contain 3 sad little Oreo cakes. If you ask me, those things only serve to whet your appetite and make you MORE hungry for dessert. One of these pudding cups is enough for me. They are also sugar free, which is whatever to me, but you might care (maybe if you are on the Atkins diet? If you are, stop right now and e-mail me so I can give you the secrets of the patented Erin diet that actually works and doesn't involve eating mayonnaise covered bacon.) They do, however, contain 6g of something called 'sugars alcohol', and I don't know what that's all about but I do likes me sugar and me booze, so count me in. Hey, eat it with some margaritas and you've got yourself a regular fiesta! Cue the maracas and me wearing a headband and a deadstock bikini, doing the Frug with Elvis on the sandy beaches of Mexico. Ole!
Jell-O Sugar Free Dulce de Leche Pudding Cups have 60 calories, 10 from fat.
Other stuffs and things
In a shameless attempt to promote my blog, I joined Twitter. You can follow me by looking me up under the user name kodachromerin. If I get some followers I'll try to post mini-reviews or diet/fitness/food related stuff. Or just other boring updates about my life, but I'll try to keep those to a minimum.
Also, I am looking for some tofu suggestions. I had a block of extra firm that's expiration date was today so this morning I cut it up and fried it. So far I have attempted to eat it with a fork and some Trader Joe's garlic aioli mustard sauce for dipping. It's been... interesting. So any ideas would be appreciated.
I found a great website for healthy recipes: Eat Better America. A nice feature is their 'healthified' recipes- taking traditionally atomically fatty or unhealthy foods and substituting ingredients to make them healthier. I don't know about you, but my poor body is so used to eating super healthy everything and diet versions of things that I get a little sick to my tummy when I eat out and they use all real butter, fat, etc. (This is either a good thing or a bad thing.)
That's all for today. Follow me on Twitter! And comment and let me know how you use tofu. Bonus points if you can tell me how to make tofu pudding.